Tuesday, November 15, 2011
Sunday, October 9, 2011
I hope not. No offense if you are but your about to hear me complain until I don't have anything else to complain about because honestly, I just need to get somethings off my chest without anyone interrupting me or telling me that I'm not being nice or whatever. So if you don't want to listen, or technically speaking read, all my complains from the last, o you know, month and half that I've been at school, then I suggest that you just click that nice little red x at the top of the internet or you click the back button and go back to the last thing you were looking at because I'm kinda in a ticked off mood and I just need to rant.
If you want to read my rant, and I'm not really sure why you would want to (besides if your mother and you want to know why I'm ticked) because its just me whining about my life not going the way I want it to even though this isn't my life, I'm only here because of the grace of God.
With me saying that I realize I probably shouldn't rant on about how my room-mate has been driving me crazy or about how I hate being a person that over analyzes things and takes things too personally or how I am so stressed out in school that I don't understand why I am even considered a college student, and me continuing to rant about these things are so little compared to the plan that God has for me.
So I don't understand why I get so dang frustrated when these things happen. Maybe its because I am human. And being human means making mistakes. And let me tell you that I make a lot of mistakes. A LOT! Maybe I get frustrated with these things because life is so different than it has ever been in the 19 years that I have been living. I've never lived away from home before, heck, I've never been away from my parents for more than 3 weeks. So going and living 4 freakin' hours away from them is really hard sometimes. Did I mention that I really miss those to crazy people called parents? O because I do. I think I get frustrated with these internally struggles the most because moving away and growing up is hard. It's a learning process for sure. I know that God has some amazing plans for me (He even says this in Jeremiah 29:11) and all these struggles are for a reason but I don't know the reason yet and that really frustrates me too.
I am kinda of a control freak. Okay mom, kinda might be wrong. I AM a control freak. And since moving away from home, me controlling anything, was thrown out the window about 2 seconds once I pulled away from my place I called home. Being in control isn't what I'm suppose to do anyways. All control should be placed in God, I know this, but guess what! I'm a sinner. I forget sometimes. Or a ton of times. And I fail at remember that I can not control everything. It sucks. I hate it. But I know that when I let God control my life everything, and I do mean EVERYTHING, goes better. Even though it is super hard for me to give up my control, I know I need to. Its important.
So guess what. This so called "rant" has completely changed from what I thought it was going to be. I was just going to get on here and type away about how annoying my life is right now and how frustrated and aggravated and annoyed I am. But I realized as I started typing, that isn't what my heavenly Father would want me to do. He would want me to give it all to him. He wants me to not worry about what people are thinking about me or if they like me. He doesn't care if my make-up is on or if my hair looks perfect. He created me. He made me look the way I do. He LOVES the way I look, even when I wake up in the mornings and I look like I was hit by a truck a few too many times. He likes that.... And I should too. In the bible, God says he will never gives too much to handle (1 Corinthians 10:13), it doesn't say this exactly that way but being reminded that our God loves us so much that he would send his only son, who was perfect, to die a death that no one can even imagine, is my definition of true love.
True Love. Jesus Christ. It make me think of the song by Phil Wickman. The words below are part of the song:
Come close listen to the story
About a love more faithful than the morning
The Father gave His only Son just to save us
The earth was shaking in the dark
All creation felt the Fathers Broken Heart
Tears were filling Heaven's Eyes
The day that True Love died, the day that True Love died
When blood and water hit the ground
Walls we couldn't move came crashing down
We were free and made alive
The day that True Love died, The day that True Love died
I love these words. They are so powerful. It is so hard to even comprehend a love this great. I love the words when it says, "Walls we couldn't move cam crashing down. We were free and made alive," because it reminds me about how amazing Christ love for us is. Walls we couldn't move because of our sins because of our failures because of our wrong doings were broken down and crushed and forever gone because Jesus Christ died for us, which makes us free and alive to live. We no longer have to die a painful death because the Father sent His only Son to SAVE us! Fromour problems. To me, I needed to hear these words today. I need to be reminded sometimes that I am loved. I need to be reminded sometimes that I'm not alone. I was bought with a price and I am the princess of the King of all Kings. And I just have to say that the feeling of everlasting, unfailing love is a pretty dang good feeling.
P.S.- I love when Christ interrupts my negative thoughts and completely turns me around to him.... that kinda might have just happened. Okay, it totally did.
Friday, October 7, 2011
Friday, September 30, 2011
The main place I shop, especially for jeans would be this place. They normally always have cute clothes and some great shoes. Flip-flops or sandals. Great sweater in the winter too. And nice, modest shorts for the summer. My favorite place. Speaking of this place, I have two $15 giftcards there... I should go look around there.... Mental note made.
Thursday, September 29, 2011
College has been, by far, the best experience of my life! And that's an understatement. I have learned so much about myself and about others in the month and one week that I have been here than I would have learned anywhere else. I have met some pretty incredible people and have had so many opportunities to share my faith... I just can not even put into words how awesome of an experience it has been.
So many things have happened since I've moved to the wonderful San Marcos. I left my hometown on Tuesday, August 23 with my parents. We stayed the night in a hotel in Austin that night because the next day, I had check in at Texas State at 11am and I didn't want to miss anything. Little did I know, God had some other plans for me that day. We left the hotel the next morning (Wednesday, August 24), at about 10:15ish, since it only takes about 30ish minutes to get to San Marcos from there. In the next few pictures, you'll figure out what happen:
Sunday, April 24, 2011
Wednesday, April 20, 2011
I am so tired today. I didn't go to sleep until after 4AM last night… That just shouldn't be humanly possible. But I could not for the love of goodness stop thinking about different things going on in my life. My future, my friends and family, my relationship with the Lord, school currently and school in the future aka college and many other things that just came to mind. I was so frustrated which didn't help anything and I was so tired, I became an emotional mess. This might sound weird to some people but I love the feeling after a good long cry, especially if I cry at night. The only thing is I like to sleep a long time after the waterworks and this didn't get to happen. I only got 2 ½ hours of sleep……… not enough! But I feel somewhat better today and I hope that all my stress for things going on starts to dwindle soon.
I am so excited about college but like I said before it completely freaks me out. I know I will be successful but the thought of failing does pop into my head. I am so nervous about meeting new people (because I tend to judge way too quickly. I have high standards for people, which is terrible and wrong but I am working on it) and building lasting relationships with others. I am also starting freak out about finding a church home and a Sunday school class to join. I've been thinking about how I have gone to the same church that I am going to now since we moved here 12 years ago. I have been with the same group of girls (which I have never been super close with) for that time period too so I'm ready to go find my own church home but thinking about it makes me scared and nervous but also o so excited.
Did I say that I was tired? Because I am. Really tired.
So that is what is going on with me emotionally since I know everyone in the blog world wants to know about it. And right now in my "what people see on the outside" life, there is really nothing abnormal going on. I wake up, go to school, come home, eat lunch (sometimes, sometimes I forget), go to work, leave work and on Mondays go to class, Tuesdays go home and eat dinner, Wednesday go to church, Thursdays go home and eat dinner, and Fridays come home and eat dinner. I do other things on Tuesdays, Thursdays and Fridays, but it always varies. I have a pretty exciting life, right?
Graduation is almost here! We just started our sixth 6th weeks of the school year and I'm so ready to be done. I am ready for some change in my life. As scary as it is, it so very exciting. (Can you tell I have very mixed emotions about this?)
And this summer is going to be SUPER busy! I graduate May 28th and then the craziness begins:
June 8-9 I have orientation at Texas State. This isn't Fish Camp. Just orientation.
June 13-17 is Vacation Bible School (I am so pumped I get to do it this year because the last 4 years I have had cheer camp the same exact week)
July 1-9 Babysitting Beach Trip (I go as the nanny)
July 10-15 High School Camp for church
July 17-21 Middle School Camp for church (I'm still not sure if I'll go as a youth leader yet)
July 26-31 Mission Trip to St. Louis
And I'll also be working when I'm home and I'll also have fish camp during the summer sometime, I just hope it's not during High School Camp or Mission Trip. It can run over any of the other things. So I'll be crazy busy… But I'll have lots of pictures.
Hope all of you are having a wonderful Wednesday!
Peace and Love!
Sunday, April 17, 2011
This was the title of the sermon today. To say that Sundays always fill my heart and make me happy would be an understatement. I love Sundays. Although it's hard to wake up "early" and get ready, once I'm at church (if I go in with a happy, joyful and positive attitude, and even when I don't), I seem to get something fantastic brought to my attention or I get questions I've been asking answered. And today was no different.
For those of you who do not go to church, today (Sunday, April 17) is Palm Sunday. This is the Sunday that comes before Easter. And today, in my opinion, was just what I needed before this next week. The sermon was titled "Faces in the Crowd: Just Missing Jesus" and the main verse was John 13:21-30. It says:
21 After he had said this, Jesus was troubled in spirit and testified, "Very truly I tell you, one of you is going to betray me."
22 His disciples stared at one another, at a loss to know which of them he meant. 23 One of them, the disciple whom Jesus loved, was reclining next to him. 24 Simon Peter motioned to this disciple and said, "Ask him which one he means."
25 Leaning back against Jesus, he asked him, "Lord, who is it?"
26 Jesus answered, "It is the one to whom I will give this piece of bread when I have dipped it in the dish." Then, dipping the piece of bread, he gave it to Judas, the son of Simon Iscariot. 27 As soon as Judas took the bread, Satan entered into him.
So Jesus told him, "What you are about to do, do quickly." 28 But no one at the meal understood why Jesus said this to him. 29 Since Judas had charge of the money, some thought Jesus was telling him to buy what was needed for the festival, or to give something to the poor.30 As soon as Judas had taken the bread, he went out. And it was night.
After reading through these verses, we did this outline. And the way my pastor presented this was awesome. I'll attach the sermon below the outline so if you want to listen you are more than welcome to. *I'm uploading this blog on Sunday so the online sermon won't be online for a day or two*
This is the outline:
Sermon Notes Sunday, April 17, 2011
"Faces in the Crowd: Just Missing Jesus"
The story of Judas Iscariot is the story of a wasted life. He had every opportunity to choose well and yet, rejected Jesus Christ. How is it possible to be so close and still miss relationship to Jesus and eternity in heaven? It happens all the time. Pray for today as we celebrate the Lord's Supper and focus our hearts on the Savior.
- We miss Jesus when we think we are
fooling Him .
- We miss Jesus when we want Him to
fit our mold .
- We miss Jesus when we allow
closeness to breed familiarity .
- We miss Jesus when we partner with
the wrong people .
- We miss Jesus when we
ignore His invitations .
- We miss Jesus when we
reject His love .
- We miss Jesus when we know
guilt without repentance .
"A man ought to examine himself before he eats of the bread and drinks of the cup. For anyone who eats and drinks without recognizing the body of the Lord eats and drinks judgment himself" (1 Corinthians 11:28-29 NIV)
This sermon made me think about how sometimes I am not always joyful with the things I do. I don't always thank my Heavenly Father for giving me a roof over my head, food on the table, parents and family members that love me, and all the other little things in life that add up to be very big things. I also thought about the main question which is "Am I missing Jesus?" For me, I have accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior BUT just because I have done that, does not mean that my journey is done. I have to live my ENTIRE life, not just parts of my life, for him. And sometimes that is tough and hard. But I have to remember that not everything is going to be easy with my walk with Christ. I'm going to have days that test my patience, my strength and my will-power. I have to remember that my life is because of Christ love for me. He died on the cross for my sins, paying the highest sacrifice. I don't know what your answer is to that question above but I hope that if you don't already believe that Jesus Christ is the Son of God and he died on the cross for your sins to make a way for you to go to heaven, that you would accept this amazing gift that has been given to you because you never know when your last breath will be.
Hoping everyone is having a wonderful Sunday!
Peace and Love!
Saturday, April 16, 2011
I don't know about anybody else, but I love Saturdays when I don't have anything planned and I get to sleep in. Even better when I have nothing planned all day and I get to sleep till whenever I get up and I get to do whatever I feel like doing. Like today. I was completely lazy and I didn't want to do anything so I stayed in bed until way to late but I'm a teenager so that's acceptable.. right? But I was slightly productive today and I cleaned my room! WOOHOO! I was productive! And when I say clean, I don't mean I just picked the dirty clothes up off the floor and threw anyway the junk mail in the corners. I mean I vacuumed the edges of my room, moved my furniture around, threw away things that I will probably need later and then after all that even changed the sheets on my bed. So I say today was pretty productive. I still haven't taken a shower. But it's not like I'm leaving the house. Its 11o'clock at night. Then after all of that, I made chocolate cake balls! Well, I started them. And so far they look pretty good, even though they are chocolate and not white cake. Here is the recipe I used. It's a Paula Deen recipe, so it has to be good right?!?
Paula's Cake Balls
Paula's own version of this trendy sweet!
Cook Time: 20 Minutes
Smithfield Product: None
- 1 (18.25 ounce) package cake mix
- 1 (16 ounce) container prepared cake frosting
- 6 ounces of chocolate flavored confectioners coating disks or bar (available in white chocolate, dark or milk)
- Food Coloring (optional)
- Paula's Favorite Combinations:
- *Red Velvet Cake/Cream Cheese Frosting and dipped in white chocolate coating
- *Strawberry Supreme Cake/Strawberries and Cream Frosting - Dipped in Chocolate Coating
- *White Cake/Mint Chocolate Chip Frosting - Dipped in Chocolate Coating
- *Caramel Cake/Chocolate Mocha Frosting - Dipped in Chocolate Coating
- *White Cake/Wild Cherry Vanilla Frosting - Dipped in Dark Chocolate Coating
- *French Vanilla Cake/White Chocolate Almond Frosting - Dipped in Chocolate Coating
- *Dark Chocolate Cake/Cream Cheese Frosting - Dipped in White Chocolate Coating
- *Spice Cake/Cream Cheese Frosting - Dipped in White Chocolate Coating
- *Lemon Cake/Lemon Frosting - Dipped in White Chocolate Coating
- *Confetti Cake/Vanilla Frosting - Dipped in White Chocolate Coating
Prepare the cake mix according to the directions on the box. When cake is finished baking allow to cool for 30 minutes. Crumble the cake into a large bowl using a stand mixer or a hand mixer. Add the frosting and mix until well combined. Place the bowl in the refrigerator for at least 3 hours or overnight.
Line a baking tray with wax paper. Use a melon baller as a scooper to form balls with the cake mixture. Place on wax paper. Once you have used all of the cake mixture, place the baking tray in the freezer for 1 hour. Melt the chocolate in a glass bowl of the microwave, stirring every 5-10 seconds until smooth. At this point you can add a bit of food coloring if you are using white chocolate.
Remove the balls from the freezer. Using one toothpick, pick up the balls one at a time and dip in the chocolate. Use a second toothpick to slide the ball off the first toothpick onto the wax paper lined baking tray.
NOTE: We found that an old Easter egg dipper works as well. If the balls fall off the toothpick into the chocolate, they are not firm enough to work with and you'll need to place them back in the freezer for additional time
Once you have covered all the balls in chocolate coating place the tray in the refrigerator until the chocolate coating is set. At this point you can drizzle other chocolate on the balls for decoration.
Serve with a cold glass of milk!
Hope everyone has had a great Saturday and received lots of rest and relaxation.
Peace and Love!
- *Red Velvet Cake/Cream Cheese Frosting and dipped in white chocolate coating
Friday, April 15, 2011
I really hate when you write a whole long blog and then Microsoft Word stops working… That really bugs me. Maybe because it just happened. Let's see if I can rewrite this.
I don't really read. I'm not a big reader. I don't like reading. Maybe because I'm dyslexic (and yes I had to use spell check on that) or maybe because I think it's boring or maybe because I have ADHD and I can't focus when I read. But those are all excuses. Don't get me wrong I do read. I like books. Its fun to have a good book to read and you don't want to put it down. But that is really hard for me to find. I hope that as I get older I can start to enjoy reading. I don't really know what will happen. Without further ado I am going to share with you my favorite books because I am not currently reading any:
A Walk to Remember
The Doll People (and the second book The Meanest Doll in the World)
To Kill A Mockingbird
The Boxcar Children Series
The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn
These are just a few. My mom introduced me to Karen Kingsbury and Nicholas Sparks and I love their books. I also am forced to read some of these books because of school. And at the time I hate them but then after school ends I normally really enjoy some of them. And some of these I learned about when I was a kid. I love children's chapter books for many reasons. 1. They are easy to read. 2. There isn't any bad language. 3. They are normally really good stories. But that's all I can think of for now. Hope everyone is having a fabulous Friday!!!
Peace and Love!
Wednesday, April 13, 2011
As I am reflecting on an unusual day, I think about how people can have so many emotions. It's crazy; I have laughed, cried, been angry, upset, confused, frustrated, annoyed, and content; and that has been just today and it is only the afternoon…. But I think that is normally for a girl. Right?
This morning, when I was getting dressed, I didn't think anything was wrong with my t-shirt, black Nike shorts, and my tennis shoes. Let me remind you two things: First- I am 4'10". I'm short, yes, I know. So pants, skirts, dresses, and shorts are all longer on me. Seconded- I go to a high school with 4,000 kids. That is a lot of students. Just keep that in mind when you read my story. So when I got into school that last thing I thought was going to happen was me getting in trouble for my outfit choice. The "normal" rule for shorts is finger-tip length or mid-thigh, correct? WRONG O JELLY O!!! We aren't allowed to wear athletic shorts to my school…. WHAT?!?! When did this rule happen? We are allowed to be on our phones in the hall and have facial hair, but we can't wear athletic shorts. I think that is dumb! But I understand that some people wear their shorts SUPER short but if you know me at all you know that I am super conservative so ME being out of dress code is just hilarious. Anyway, I cried because I don't like getting in trouble and because I was frustrated and because the lady that told me to change was EXTREMELLY! rude about it. I think I was just taken back by it. And her lack of caring about another person's feelings. Or maybe she was just doing her job. But my amazing mother brought me some pants up to the school. And I am so thankful for that so I didn't have to wear their uncomfortable sweatpants all day.
On to something else, I think so.
Today in my Teen Leadership class, that I really do not like going to, we had a really great discussion about our values. Many of the people in our class are disrespectful and do not care about anyone but themselves. So I thought it was very interesting when many people said that they valued respect. How can you value something if you don't do it yourself? So when the teacher asked if any of us had any questions, I popped my hand up and asked (and I quote myself) "People say they value respect but do they value getting respect or getting respect?" My teacher asked me if that was a rhetorical question and I told him yes, I knew my answer but I wanted everyone else's answer too. And it was very interesting to see people's reactions and comments to it.
Here is something to leave you guys with:
"For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but of power and love and discipline." 2 Timothy 1:7
"He alone is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress and I will not be shaken." Psalm 62:6
That's all I have today. Hope everyone is have a fantabulous day! And even though my day started rocky, my foundation is strong and today has been wonderful!
Peace and Love!
Thank you Jesus for giving me a heart for people. Thank you Jesus for allowing me to understand. Thank you Jesus for being a wonderful and mighty foundation!
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
Life as I know it is about to completely change and there is nothing I can do but go with it. As I am wrapping up my Senior year of high school and deciding on colleges and what I want to do with my life and other "adult" things I am having to choose, I'm learning I need to take in every moment. Even though I am so excited about going to college and starting a new chapter in my life, I am scared out of my mind. I have no idea what is in store for me. I don't know if I am going to mess up or fail. I will probably meet my husband. I will meet amazing friends that will turn into lifelong friends. But I need to remember that everything happens for a reason and to appreciate every moment that I am given. This past year I have been so busy that I have not always lived in the moment but thought about how awesome the future is going to be. I hope that I can remember while I am in college (which that is so weird to say) to live in the moment and be thankful for everything that happens, the good, the bad, and the ugly.
BUT! Let's get caught up what has happened this past year…. (Since it's been that long, sorry about that!)
Senior year has been so much fun and I can't believe that I only have 45 days left at the high school… that just seems so weird. I started the school year out being the mascot (like I had been since my freshman year) and was in the cheerleading class again which I have really missed this semester because cheer class, I literally had to do nothing. Which I enjoyed. Some days, the boy mascots who drive me nuts but I miss that. I enjoyed it.
|Senior girls in cheerleading|
My mom was honored to get to participate in being at the Senior Pep-Rally during the fall. She got to dress up in the mascot and mascot with me during the pep-rally. She refused to create a skit with me which I was perfectly alright with. She was a great sport and did a fantastic job!
|Me and Mom before|
|Mom and me during the pep-rally|
|Mom, Crystal, Me, and Crystal's Mom during the pep-rally|
|We had to learn a dance, this was during that|
|Me and Mom after the pep-rally|
That night at the football game we also had Senior night and my awesome parents came (like they always do) and participated in all the things that they had to do. (Take pictures with me, give me flower, and stand and cheer on the football players as they came through the tunnel)
|Mom, me and Dad at Senior night|
|Back Row: Trystan, Haley, Addie, Morgan, Erin, Ashley, Emily, and Krista|
Front Row: Kristi, Me, Abby, Natalie, Elizabeth
Jeremy and Heidi were able to come to town for Thanksgiving and Christmas which was so exciting! They got to bring their puppy dog, Bruiser, and they got another dog when they were here. (Long story made short- Lost Bruiser, Heidi's parents started searching for another dog and found one, found Bruiser, still had dog they had found.) So we got to meet both Bruiser and Brittany. They were great dogs!
I also got my wisdom teeth taken out during Christmas break, 3 or 4 days before Christmas. But I was so glad that they were able to take them out and they didn't mess up my teeth like they do to some peoples.
We had so much snow this year. We even missed 4 days of school, FOUR people! That is a ton of snow (which was really ice for the first 3 days) but it was so much fun to not have to go to school those days and get to hang out with my mom and Leslie and Josh those days. And I even made a to-do list and did most of the things on it.
I went on my last Revolve tour with our girl's ministry. And I had so much fun! I definitely was in need of that weekend when I went and I am so glad that I decided to go because I got to meet some great girls and learned so much about how awesome my Jesus is!
I finally went to a Cheer Banquet. The last one but I went. And I had a good time. My parents went with me and it was the Thursday night before D-NOW so I wasn't super excited about it but I knew I needed to go. When I went up to get my certificate, rose, and trophy (yes, I got an awesome trophy for being the mascot), the cheer captain, Taryn, had wrote a small thank you to me for being a great mascot the past 4 years, which I thought was really nice.
D-NOW=AMAZING… enough said
I was so blessed to get to go to Tegucigalpa, Honduras during my spring break this year. I had the most amazing time of my life and I will never look at some things the same way. I would love to be able to go back some day. I will hopefully make another post about the trip.
|I miss him...|